Most Thai ladies are very traditional and that usually means no sex until marriage as that is bad face for them and their family. So with tradition you would first marry her in her village or town with a gathering of family, friends and the local monks which consists of usually 9 monks to do the ceremony. When you have decided to marry the village elders will pick out several good days depending on the months when it is the best luck days to marry. Thais are superstitious of several things like this so it is best of course to let your wife and her family pick the best luck day for you all so you will have long and happy lives together.
On the wedding day food is prepared for the monks and after they eat, they will chant and give blessing to the new couple. Afterwards before the monks leave they are each given an envelope with a little money in it. Giving the monks food and a little money at the ceremony is very important for the Thais. It is what they call doing boon and is the only way that the monks have to eat. The local temple belongs to the Thai people as a whole and the community works together to make the temple and the community a better place. It seems to be a very good system that the western culture should learn from. The wedding is a fun ceremony that can last 1 to 3 days filled with music, food and yes a little drinking on the part of many also.
Depending on the size of the wedding it can be from 1 to even 3 days with 2 being the norm. Starting the day before the wedding, people start preparing food, eating, talking, music and fun. The day of the wedding more family and friends come to eat, drink, talk and participate in the wedding. The monks then come and are given food and after they give blessings to the new couple.
Now also when you marry the custom is for you the man to give his new wife at the ceremony some money and some Thai gold such as a necklace and or a bracelet, not the traditional diamond ring set of the western culture. The money ranges anywhere from 50,000 baht to 100,00+ baht and usually both a gold necklace and bracelet. Gold is measured in baht here and 1 baht is 15.2 grams of gold. Usually a necklace is at least 1 baht in weight and the bracelet the same. Again it would be in very bad face not to have some money and gold for your wife at the ceremony.
The reason for the money? Besides being the marriage custom of Thailand - The money pays for the wedding and if any is left can help the girl’s parents some. At the weddings much food and drinks are purchased for the family and friends and sometimes live entertainment. The gold of course is for your new wife and Thai gold which can be bought here at good prices is the only kind that the Thais really recognize as real gold. The money that you would normally pay for a diamond ring set in the US or the UK can be used to give at the wedding and for the purchase of the Thai gold here and you will look very good to the family and friends of your new wife and you will actually save money and time. You be the judge on the amount of money you give. The average I have heard is 50,000 to 100,000 baht with 100,000 being the normal minimum for foreigners marrying Thai ladies. The very poorest of poor Thais give at least 20,000 baht just to give you an idea. This custom is also a show of love and commitment to your bride.
If you have decided to make The Kingdom of Thailand your home then one great thing is that you will be able to live here more affordably compared to western countries, and if you have a great wife then life is good. A good Thai wife can be the best wife that you have ever dreamed about. Just take the time to find a good girl before marriage and also it is advisable to meet all the family of the girl prior to making any commitment. Take my advice and follow the Thai marriage customs and let your wife and her family do most of the planning.
While the money exchange at the wedding can seem strange and almost against our western culture. We must understand that we are in Thailand and this is the Thai custom, and with understanding we realize that really there is nothing wrong with this. The money to pay for the wedding has to come from somewhere.
So with all that understood and in perspective then no need to worry, it's really not that much different than the western marriage except for the fact it is a much more fun ceremony and party atmosphere with fun for all from the little children to the 80 year old village ladies dancing to the Thai music. Take lots of pictures and have fun yourself --- it is an event you will cherish all of your life |
